Mason made the transition from preschool to summer camp yesterday. He was beyond excited. When he woke up, I was in the kitchen fixing a cup of coffee. He came in and said, in a very sleepy voice, "Mom, guess what? Today, I'm grown." And he turned around and walked out of the kitchen. He makes my heart smile so many times during the day..... that's just one example. I am so blessed that he is my son.
I wanted you to know that you will always have a piece of my heart. I miss you already and it hasn't even been 24 hours yet. I have cried rivers today.... some of them shed while laying in your bed trying so hard to remember every detail about you. They are mostly tears of sorrow but some are tears of joy because I know that you are not suffering anymore. Your back is completely healed and you are not hurting. I miss you already. I will miss the way that you smell, your soft skin, your phone calls telling me that lunch was ready, trips to WalMart, corned beef and cabbage... no one can make it like you, your tenderness, your smile, your love of clothes and shoes, and so much more. When I sat back today and observed the family that started with you, I was amazed. You have left a legacy that will go forever. I miss you already... have I mentioned that?? I will miss seeing you in your yard messing with your flowers or sweeping the steps. How many times did I ride by and not stop?? I regret that so much. I should have stopped every time that I saw you out there no matter where I was headed.
I feel so displaced without you here. Even when you were so sick, I knew where you were and I could visit you every day. Today, I didn't know where to go. Home? Mom's? I felt like I had no where to go because I wanted to be with you and I couldn't. So I chose to sit at your house with your things. I miss you already.
I love you a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck! Thank you for being such an amazing grandmother.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Mason's last day of preschool is today. When did my baby boy get so big? Seems like yesterday I dropped him off at preschool and left with tears in my eyes because I didn't want to leave him there. Today I dropped him off and left with tears in my eyes because I can't imagine him being anywhere else. All of his teachers have been wonderful. They have loved him through their dedication, hardwork and overall love for their profession. Mason has grown to love them as if they are a part of his family and even prays for them at night. On Monday, he starts summer camp at the YMCA. He is ready for the change but his momma is feeling a little sad about the transition. I guess I have to let him grow up a little bit..... what a bummer! :)
My mom and my grandmother share the same birthday. Every year they celebrate together. Every year they open present together, blow out their candles together and eat cake together. This year is extremely bitter sweet. My grandmother is very sick with pneumonia and is not expected to live much longer. She had back surgery in November and just hasn't been able to recover from it. I promise you that I can feel my heart breaking in my chest. I know that God brings us into this world knowing the exact moment when we will leave. I know that my PaPa is waiting for MaMa in Heaven. I know that he is whistling the days away waiting for her to join him. But I also know that doesn't make it any easier to let her go. I doesn't make it easier to think about life without her in it.
So, on this special day, I am wishing MaMa a very special 81st Happy Birthday!! And to my mom, I love you so much! You inspire me every day to be a better woman and a better mom. You are the ultimate example and I thank God that He choose me to be your daughter.
Look what I bought for myself! Yes, I bought myself a necklace. No, it's not my birthday or anniversary. The day I ordered it was just a normal Monday. I am so glad that I felt like I deserved a necklace that day because it came in the mail today and I love, love, love it!!! I was browsing a blog about a week ago and came across this website. I highly recommend you go a have a look at Lisa's jewelry. It is all beautiful and very different!
I am not sure what is going on with my header and other graphics...... Sorry! Hopefully I can get it figured out soon! Mason's pictures that run along the top of my blog are so much cuter than that small white box with a red X in it!
Friday, May 23, 2008
West Michigan Christian music fans are expressing their sympathy for Grammy-winning singer-songwriter Steven Curtis Chapman after the death of his 5-year-old daughter in an accident Wednesday in the family's driveway.
"We opened up the phone lines and people called in and wanted to pray right over the air," said Troy West, morning show co-host on contemporary Christian music radio station WJQK-FM (99).
Maria Sue Chapman was struck by a car driven by one of her teenage brothers, according to authorities in Franklin, Tenn., who added they believe no charges will result from what they termed "a tragic accident."
The child died 10 days after her fifth birthday. Chapman's manager, Jim Houser, also noted in a Web site posting the family had been hours away from hosting a high school graduation party for their son Caleb when the accident occurred.
Maria was the youngest of three Chinese girls the family had adopted, two of them through the the Nashville, Tenn., office of Bethany Christian Services. Chapman and his wife, Mary Beth, also have three biological children -- two teenage sons and a 21-year-old daughter.
"They are loving and wonderful parents and a great family -- they must be devastated," said Brian De Vos, manager of Michigan operations for Bethany Christian Services. "He's been such an advocate for adoption -- I know their commitment to kids."
DeVos has known the Chapmans for eight years and worked with them on Shaohannah's Hope, a foundation the couple named for one of their adopted daughters and established to help families through the often expensive adoption process.
During Chapman's most recent concert tour -- which included a stop at Sunshine Community Church last September -- the singer raised $340,000 for the foundation. While here, he awarded a grant of about $3,000 to a local family for adoption expenses. He also has raised funds for construction of an orphanage in China for special-needs children who likely will never be adopted.
Chapman, 45, has sold more than 10 million albums, has had dozens of No. 1 Christian radio hits, and has won more than 50 Dove Awards -- exceeding any other individual artist. Yet he would much rather talk about his family or his work with adoptions and orphans. "I have sung a lot of his songs," said local Christian singer Marty Miller, of Belmont, posting comments on an area Christian musicians' Web site. "Please be in prayer for the family." Chapman's current hit song on Christian radio is "Cinderella," a ballad about precious times spent together by father and daughter. It was inspired by a real family moment.
Every night for a long time, Mason has said the "Now I lay me down to sleep" prayer before bed. After he says the entire prayer he adds his own prayer requests. Help all the sick people in the world..... Help me do good at t-ball..... PaPa and MaMa...... Buster, our dog who is already in doggie Heaven...... He even prays for God. On and on he will go about all sorts of things. He sits in his bed and basically has a very detailed conversation with God. One night last week as he was praying, he said, "And God please help all the people with breath cancer." He was very serious so I held in my giggle. I left the room thinking that maybe I needed to brush my teeth again.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
As I am typing this, my heart feels like it is breaking into pieces. My grandmother is very sick and in the hospital. She has been in and out of the hospital since November. I tell her all the time that she is one of the strongest women that I will ever know. She has been through so much these past few months and she continues to fight. If I just had a small peice of her strength, I would be set for the rest of my life.
My MaMa has always been so special to me. I can remember vividly spending day after day at her house. We lived across the street for MaMa so it was easy for me to sneak over. Our babysitter always knew that if she couldn't find me, I was at MaMa and PaPa's house. When I was young I would lay on her couch and watch cartoons. We would go in the yard and pick flowers or collect pears from her pear tree. Sometimes we would go to Roses or Sky City. I remember her taking me many times to get my pictures done at Roses.... even when I was a teenager, she still took me to get my picture done.
She has a special corner in my heart that will always be just hers. My prayer is that she pulls through this sickness that she is facing but if that is not God's will, then I pray that she will be comfortable and at peace. She has suffered for so long.... most would have already given up. But she is a fighter. Please pray for my MaMa as you read this post.
I know it has been a long, long, long time since I have blogged. I think that I have blogger burn out! But here are a few pictures of Mason and some of our furry kids. I hope that everyone has a blessed Easter!
P.S. Mason had a fight with his bike.... as you can see, the bike won!
Isn't it just amazing how God answers prayers? You spend so much time praying and waiting for a "sign" that God is really listening..... and then it happens. And most of the time it doesn't happen like you think it should or even when you think it should. It happens when you least expect it to.... when you are surrounded by sadness and tears. When you feel totally helpless and confused. God answers prayers in His time.... not ours. And let me tell you, He has perfect timing. He knows when we have had enough. He knows when we just can't take another step. He knows when to pick us up and carry us. He takes us to the edge and then He pulls us back to Him. He lines up people, places and things to show us that He is in charge. In the midst of a disaster, He opens doors. Tonight I am praising God for being a forgiving God who ALWAYS shows up.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Tonight I took Mason downtown to trick or treat. There were so many kids running around and even more gnats. He really had fun trick or treating from store to store and looking at what all the other kids were dressed up as. He was the Ghost Rider. Several of the kids were afraid of him. I had to keep taking his mask off to show them that he was just a boy.
Pirate Jackson
Butterfly Jordan
McKenzie, Mason and Gabby
Now that Mason's hair is growing, we can do all kinds of funky styles in the tub.
I Googled "Lori needs" to see what would come up. Here is my list of needs according to Google....
Lori needs ideas and volunteers. Lori needs to be aware of her own anger. Lori needs help. Lori needs a change. Lori needs to cut her mom some slack. Lori needs a little hocus-pocus from dear departed Aunt. LORI NEEDS CAFFEINE TO STAY AWAKE!!!
Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried; Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied. I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate... and the Master so gently said,"Wait."
"Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply. "Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!" Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard? By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.
My future and all to which I relate hangs in the balance and you tell me to Wait?" I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign. Or even a 'no,' to which I'll resign.
You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe, We need but to ask, and we shall receive. Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry: I'm weary of asking! I need a reply.
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate as my Master replied again, "Wait." So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut, and grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting...for what?"
He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine... and He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign. I could shake the heavens and darken the sun. I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.
I could give all you seek and pleased you would be. You'd have what you want, but you wouldn't know Me. You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint. You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.
You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair; you'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there. You'd not know the joy of resting in Me when darkness and silence are all you can see.
You'd never experience the fullness of love when the peace of My spirit descends like a dove. You would know that I give, and I save, for a start, But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.
The glow of My comfort late into the night, the faith that I give when you walk without sight. The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask From an infinite God who makes what you have last.
You'd never know should your pain quickly flee, what it means that My grace is sufficient for thee. Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true, but oh, the loss if I lost what I'm doing in you.
So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see that the greatest of gifts is to truly know me. And though oft My answers seem terribly late, My most precious answer of all is still "WAIT".
Tonight I took Mason downtown to trick or treat. There were so many kids running around and even more gnats. He really had fun trick or treating from store to store and looking at what all the other kids were dressed up as. He was the Ghost Rider. Several of the kids were afraid of him. I had to keep taking his mask off to show them that he was just a boy.
Pirate Jackson
Now that Mason's hair is growing, we can do all kinds of funky styles in the tub.
